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[problemsoncauthess]

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therightful Warning Level: 69%

therightful: I destroyed your city come over ;)

code @ isopods

[A post for inbox and possibly overflow threads for Ardyn (AOL username: therightful) at Isle of Avalon.]

Comments

text

[omnicrafter]

[It had only come out during a random conversation, but the fact Emet-Selch had been used by Ardyn was a ticking time bomb for Irhya to go and kick his arse. He probably didn't even expect her to storm off with the intent of making someone hurt, but if he can go on a murderous rampage, she can rough someone up a little on his behalf.]

Oi. Ardyn?

[problemsoncauthess]

[Hm, now that's unexpected. He's spent some time trying to avoid his brother, but no one else seemed interested in Ardyn much; even his earlier "victims" and interrogators. Suddenly getting a message, much less one from someone he doesn't recognize... Curious.]

Yes?

[omnicrafter]

It's Irhya. Remember me?

I need words with you.

[problemsoncauthess]

[Oh yes, the girl with the cat ears and tail! Look at how nice he is, actually remembering her.]

Oh yes, we've met briefly, have we not? What is it, my girl?

[omnicrafter]

Do I really need to tell you what this is about?

[problemsoncauthess]

[Oh, if only Ardyn was ever in the mood to admit to anything, ever. You could walk in on him stabbing someone and he'd still be like "who, me?".]

Is that not the polite thing to do?

[omnicrafter]

Oh, please. I think we've passed the point of being polite.

Does the Calamity ring any bells?

[problemsoncauthess]

The Calamity. Hmmm.

No, I cannot say it does. Did something happen?

[ABSOLUTE. BASTARD.]

[omnicrafter]

A little bird told me you made it worse. And used a handful of unsuspecting saps to do it.

Don't make me beat the confession out of you.

text; un: 𓅃

[hor]

I found you!

[ It's not like he got his contact info when they met. But Horus is pretty good at calling in favors and finding people, so eventually he got the digits. 😎 Time to harass Mr. Destructive. ]

[problemsoncauthess]

[Fortunately, Ardyn at least isn't Somnus so he knows how to use the phones. But he is less good at figuring out who the hell is texting him, apart from some obvious cases.]

Have you, now?

[hor]

Yes!

[ He sends him a selfie to announce his identity. Horus has taken great pains to practice- he prefers speaking solely in emoji but he knows there are a lot of people who somehow can't comprehend picture-only texts even if it's a pain for Horus to write out full sentences in hieroglyphs so the phones can translate them. No one has told him about voice-to-text yet. ]

[problemsoncauthess]

[Good, let Horus suffer through having to write things out. As far as Ardyn is concerned, it's really funny.]

Ah, the young god! And now that you have found me, what is it that you want? Another round of interrogation? Or did you need someone to help you out with your 'M streak'?

[hor]

Haha, don't joke about that. Gods go into heat in the spring you know! I'm just about dying behaving myself here!

[problemsoncauthess]

[Honestly that's really funny regardless of whether it's true or not. He remembers now why he liked Horus even back during the interrogation.]

Go into heat? Now that is unexpected. So you require help with that, then?

[hor]

That wasn't why I texted but I'll think about it! You can't top me if you're interested, you know?
Where are you?

[problemsoncauthess]

You say that is not why you texted me, my boy, but each new thing you say seems to be in contradiction with that. Why do you wish to know?

[luciing]

[ In an effort to try to be more With It^TM, Somnus is actually going to contact Ardyn via technology. You see, it's part of his personal initiative to not remain stagnant as he once was if he is to better himself; and he cannot do that if he stubbornly refuses to not participate in modern means of communication.

Thus, ]

bro

[ "--ther."

It's probably the beginning of what's meant to be an entire message, but neither the "ther" nor the rest of the ~electronic mail~ arrives via text. ]

[problemsoncauthess]

[On the bright side, the time that's passed since their last meeting means that Ardyn has calmed down somewhat. On the not-bright side, receiving a communication like this from his brother is embarrassing, exhausting, and infuriating. The emotions are strong enough that Ardyn doesn't even know which one actually prevails; he groans out loud at seeing the message, smacking a hand over his eyes to try and control his temper. It does not work. There is just something about Somnus's ineptitude that is so... so aggravating. If one spends majority of his existence seeking revenge, shouldn't that revenge be at least upon a worthy opponent?

After a few minutes of trying to formulate his reply to fit enough of his annoyance into it, he replies:]

It has been at least a year, Somnus. A year, and you still could not master something as simple as this manner of communication. Must I remind you that when Besithia found me, I was just as unfamiliar with modern technology? Yet I managed to get used to it just fine. _{[ignore the fact that he probably just sucked the knowledge out of people's brains]} So why, in all of damnation, can you not do the same?

And if you actually mean to address me as "bro", I will cut all ties with you. With my blade, if necessary.

[... Well, someone is definitely doing okay and not bitter at all.]

[luciing]

[ In hindsight, Somnus should have contacted him via letter instead. Making an effort to improve his own competency with technology is all well and good, but he shouldn't do so for such an important matter. Already it's off to a bad start, not that there is ever a "good start" to begin with between the two brothers.

But some distance after their market brawl and their encounter at the concert had been a good thing. Somnus remains wary, but it is not as what his brother had said to him had gone completely over his head.

Conclusively, given all of what Somnus had done to Ardyn, it is an injustice that he is able to court another in this borrowed time, while Ardyn had all opportunity robbed from him. Now, Somnus is uncertain as to Ardyn's goal of dancing with Rinea-- perhaps he has an interest in her or perhaps it is all for show, successfully threatening Somnus in more than one way with how he had danced with her-- but one thing remains clear: they will likely run into each other again, and Ardyn isn't going away any time soon.

...And so, Ardyn's next message is going to be delivered via traditional paper mail instead, by none other than Somnus' tonberry familiar. ]

Brother,

Do you object to my courtship of lady Rinea?

[problemsoncauthess]

[After there is no reply to his text, Ardyn decides to get on with his own business, and the only reason he keeps glancing at his phone is checking the time. Definitely.

When the physical letter arrives, though, it poses a new dilemma: does he answer through text or pen? Does he answer at all? Wouldn't it be nice to leave Somnus hanging and inventing explanations for himself?

It would be, of course. But Ardyn also has to consider that it might well lead to his brother once again trying to prove to him the benefits of starting a relationship here, or speaking about his happiness with Rinea, or something equally annoying. That's not something he wants to deal with.

Eventually, Somnus will receive a reply through the familiar again. Look, big bro is being generous and writing back to you, idiot at technology that you are.]

You would admit openly to having planned to take my woman for your own, yet would seek my permission on your dalliance here?

[luciing]

[ Hey, guess what, it's his tonberry again, standing there holding both lantern and letter. The knife it normally carries is, thankfully, no where in sight. Perhaps it's a sign of amnesty. ]

There was a reason you intruded on our time at the concert. I am no fool. You would not have sought to dance with her for no reason.

Did you accomplish what you wanted?

[problemsoncauthess]

[Fine, you can talk through tonberries. Though it might probably take some effort to figure out which one is yours and which one is his. The letter starts out in Ardyn's usual, slightly lazy handwriting - at ease, word choice deliberate to be condescending.]

Is there anything I could do that you would not assume the worst of me for, I wonder? Sometimes I feel that it is enough for me to exist for you to accuse me of a desire to murder, torture, and destroy. If I step out to buy a loaf of bread, is it because I wish to kill the baker?

Not everything in my life is about you, Somnus. I had met the girl before, and she was amusing to me. I asked her for a dance as something of a joke, but she was the one to be enthusiastic about it. It was surprisingly pleasant - for both of us, apparently, - and in that manner, yes, I did accomplish what I wanted. Or I would have, had you not shown up.

What is it you fear so? That I would steal her away from you? My, but wouldn't that be a joke. That I would kill her? Yet you could bring her back easily, and then just as easily exact your vengeance on me. Not to mention that I already have earned the disfavor of the boy on the throne and his accomplices - surely you would find it very easy to see me imprisoned again, or perhaps even banished completely for my many transgressions.

[... There, his handwriting starts getting a little rougher, a little choppier. He might be having a time!]

What manner of a threat am I to you, truly? Is it not me who needs to fear your retaliation should I step out of line? After all, you are the righteous hero! The whole island is full of righteous heroes. You know full well that I have been killed here already. I have no one to rely on or speak up for me except for myself, while you could easily gather dozens of people ready to lynch me once you rely my "transgressions" to them. And yet you have the gall to treat me as a danger?

You are so terribly generous with your words of "reprieve" and "respite". Has it not occurred to you, "little brother", that the reason I cannot take advantage of them is you? For me to find someone to court here - what fine words from the man who's murdered my fiancee. No, I know full well that if I were to make any connection, find any sliver of happiness, you would be along right away to destroy it and blame me for it.

[HE'S FINE. HE'S DOING FINE. HAVING AN ABSOLUTELY NORMAL ONE LADS.]

[luciing]

I have told no one of our past, not even when you had first arrived. [ Somnus being tight-lipped on his own world, prophecy, and past had been deliberate-- it is simply not anyone else's business, and it had no place in working to save Avalon's time-wrecked world. He had all the opportunity to do so, yet he had been cautious, and two years without anyone knowing more proves it. ]

It is yours to tell, in your own words, to any. [ This is something he had denied Ardyn for two thousand years.

It's not as if Somnus is without sin. He's fairly certain if Ardyn went around telling others what he had done, the island's population would retaliate against him, instead. In fact when had first arrived upon the island, Regis had rejected him outright.

Somnus had been certain his brother was consumed by the Scourge. He had thought himself right when his brother returned to wreck their land, to corrupt others with it, gods and humans alike-- further justification, further proof that he was dangerous, that he ought to be locked away, lest he cause more chaos, which he did, causing the world to be veiled by an endless, bleak, and cold night, and he had effectively won.

But it was Somnus that caused his pain from the beginning, his tragedy, and Ardyn could have told that to any and had been righteous for it. But he hadn't, either. ]

Unless your happiness involves the harm or threat of others, I will not intrude.

[problemsoncauthess]

[It is true that Ardyn never sought out people to tell them of his own anger and Somnus's deeds. For what reason, not even he is certain - perhaps because... because it is a family matter. He could likely make Somnus a pariah here, but it would not be as satisfying as he needs it to be, nor would it change anything back in their own world. There are other things there, too, ones that Ardyn does not realize nor want to think about - especially now that his mind is busy with his anger.]

Oh, how magnanimous. Why, I suppose I should just take you at your word, like I did back then, and waltz into another trap of yours?

How will you determine whether my happiness involves the harm or threat of others? Shall I never raise my voice, never show any sign of displeasure like a good boy? If that is what you want to see from me, you'll have to settle for being disappointed, Somnus. I have no wish to behave how you or anyone else may want me to.